


I like waking up to You

by Wildechild



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Constructive Criticism Welcome, Drabble, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Haunted Houses, M/M, Pining, Pining Ryan Bergara, Sleepy Cuddles, Unrequited Love, but not hardcore angst just kinda self hating pushing feelings away angst, idk what this is honestly, sorry it's going to be really bad I haven't written a fanfic before lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-19
Updated: 2019-04-19
Packaged: 2020-01-16 07:37:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18516904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wildechild/pseuds/Wildechild
Summary: Shane is Ryan's best friend, and Ryan is trying desperately to keep his feelings for Shane from ruining said friendship





	I like waking up to You

 

Ryan didn’t know how long he had felt like this. It had just hit him like a ton of bricks, watching Shane laugh at something stupid he had said and realizing how badly he wanted to make him laugh forever and ever and how badly he wanted to press his lips against Shane’s and be wrapped up in those stupidly long limbs and _oh fuck he’s in love with his best friend._ And suddenly all those sleepovers in haunted places become that much harder, because Shane’s never going to feel the same way and God he is such a creep for ruining their friendship like this and for a while Ryan can’t even bear to imagine the mess that could happen if Shane ever found out. And so he just bottles it up, hiding his blushing face and trying not to stare too intently because the thought of creeping Shane out or making him uncomfortable makes the pit of Ryan’s stomach curl.

But it’s so much harder now, now that he’s admitted it to himself, now that he feels like a monster for admiring the curve of Shane’s shoulders, for waking up wet and sticky because his dreams are _worse_ , because his subconscious knows what he really wants, what he really needs, and will indulge in it again and again without his permission. Those mornings hit him hard every time, the shame and the loneliness swallowing him whole and making every inch of him ache. He knows what he wants is wrong, knows that his feelings are an unwanted burden in one of the best friendships he’s ever had, but waking up and not feeling the same warmth from his dreams, waking up alone in a bed that’s never felt too big until now is unbearable. But Ryan pushes it down, because what else is he supposed to do? And the show goes on, and everything’s fine because he’ll make it fine and he’ll pretend it’s fine until the day he dies.

 

Their next haunted attraction is particularly standard for what they’ve dealt with before, but looking up at the towering house still sends chills down Ryan’s spine. Disregarding the fact that it’s haunted, he’s still surprised that Shane isn’t even a little bit uncomfortable. People died in the room they’d be staying in, and you’d think that fact would make anyone a little tense. But Shane is still Shane, and so he breezes through all of the rooms, laughing and mocking and being just too endearing. And then their exploration comes to an end, and the two roll out their sleeping bags and Ryan pretends he doesn’t think too much about what the appropriate distance between their sleeping bags should be.

Ryan wakes up from a tense sleep less than an hour later, shivering. The house was freezing, and Ryan wasn’t bright enough to bring another sweatshirt. He mumbled out a quiet curse before curling up tighter, only to be startled when Shane quietly calls his name and asks him if everything’s all right.

“Yeah,” he responds, his voice hoarse. “I’m just cold.”

Shane doesn’t respond, and there’s a beat of silence and then the sound of his sleeping bag rustling as he scoots closer. And suddenly Shane’s stomach, still wrapped in his sleeping bag, is curled around Ryan’s back, and Ryan’s heart is going a million miles a minute because they’re spooning aren’t they? This isn’t just another fantasy, the unrequited love of his pathetic life is curled up with him and suddenly Shane’s arm has found its way out of his sleeping bag and is wrapping itself around Ryan’s waist and Ryan is shocked by how _warm_ Shane is and how much better the real thing is compared to his endless dreams and now how can he sleep when his heart’s trying to claw its way out of his chest, and Shane’s soft, sleepy voice fills the room again.

“Better?” he asks, and Ryan just nods, because there’s a lump in his throat he can’t swallow, but it doesn’t matter because Shane is already asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I've never really written a fanfic before so like be kind to me but critiques are welcome and also maybe let me know if you want more it's a little short I just wanted to write something but wouldn't be against adding a morning after because it kind of builds to that haha rip


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